Originally written by Steven Seiller, updated June 23, 2006

Is it really possible to de-escalate anyone, anywhere, anytime? Yes!

Imagine yourself dealing with any scenario with anyone, anywhere, and at any time with confidence and long-term foresight. This is possible with a Principle-Based approach to de-escalation.

What is Not De-escalation?

Someone who is escalated is under stress and not likely to think clearly. They are usually in a state of fight, flight, or freeze. Trying to force the situation to resolve it as you want it, is not likely to de-escalate that situation. This is not a good time to expect the escalated person to easily engage in learning, problem solving discussions, or debriefing the situation.

De-escalation is all about helping and improving a situation in the moment. It is not about making it worse. In many ways, our role is to follow the doctor’s creed of “Do no harm.” Avoid any actions which will escalate the situation. What that might be, really depends on the situation and the people involved. The fact is that something that works for one person or in one setting may not help others.

What then is De-escalation?

De-escalate  [ dee-es-kə-leyt ]: reduce the intensity of (a conflict or potentially violent situation).

When you de-escalate someone or some situation, you act to improve the situation (and not make it worse). Your intervention might be something you do, something you say, or even choosing to do or say nothing. Just about anything could be the right response.

You definitely want to avoid the wrong response. The wrong response can make the situation worse!

“One Response Does Not Fit All”

This is where you come in. De-escalation Skills involve the expertise to assess a situation, determine a supportive approach and the ability to implement the solution which successfully de-escalates the situation. The following process is particularly important:

• Assess – the situation to determine the level of escalation, risks and source of conflict
• Adapt – develop a specific approach to addressing the assessed problem
• Attend – implement the plan with your selected de-escalation techniques
  • Note: This is a continual process. Continue to re-assess the situation in order to respond effectively.
    • Whether you improve or worsen the situation or make no impact at all, you will only be able to have the right response when you continually assess and respond accordingly.

A common misconception of de-escalation skills is that you can learn a specific technique, and it will always de-escalate the person in front of you. It is not uncommon to hear people say, “I usually do _____, but this one time it didn’t work.”

The same technique will not always work because different people have different needs. You can even take the same two people and the same issue and the situation may resolve differently on a different day. You will be most effective when you can adapt in the moment to the needs of the person you’re trying to support. The only response that works every time is the right response for that specific situation.

What is Principle-Based De-escalation?

Good question! There is no “little black book” of phrases that you can just conjure that will make people de-escalate. If everyone is so different that all have different needs, how is it even possible to de-escalate anyone?!?

What you need are Universal Principles which apply to any age of person, any level of ability or disability, and any setting. A Principle-Based approach to de-escalation is effective because it guides you in any situation, no matter who you deal with.

How can I learn more?

If you are looking for some helpful and practical tips to de-escalate anyone, anywhere, anytime, our FREE eBook can help! Perhaps hearing from one of our experts on de-escalation, suits you better.  We offer FREE live presentations that cover everything in the eBook (plus you get a copy of eBook as well).

For those looking to take their learning to the next level, we have options to meet your needs, so contact us today!

Your journey towards Principle-Based De-escalation started here.  Where will it take you next?